Sunday, 9 August 2015

A Catch Up & A Bit Of Honesty

New tee from H&M, Marshall's big beautiful face, New Skinnydip London Makeup bag, Took mom for her first Five Guys, Dessert at The Diner, Admiring all the new pretty things at the Catalyst A/W preview event, Cuddles with Mary, Looking at Wedding Reception Venues, We took a little trip to Tenby and drank lots of cocktails and ate lots of pizza, Picked up some cute little home bits from H&M, Visited the Natural History Museum, Huge Lush Oxford Street haul.

I haven't posted a life post for a few months so I just thought I'd share with you what I've been up to since June, I've had a few little trips away which have done me the world of good but haven't been so good for my wallet ha! 
On a slightly more serious note I just felt like opening up a bit, I've struggled to maintain this blog over the past year and my posts have been fairly sporadic but the fact that I've kept it going at all is something which I am proud of. I've always had issues with anxiety and depression but over the past two years it's really gotten the better of me, I had absolutely no motivation for anything even getting the bus to work seemed like too much and I'd often find myself crying all the way to work or being in such a panic that I couldn't go in at all. I stopped drawing which is something I'm pretty angry at myself for and I've found the whole notion of planning my wedding overwhelming, I am excited about it but I find the idea of walking down the aisle with everyone looking at me brings me out in a cold sweat. I saw a counsellor for most of last year but I just didn't have the motivation to make the most of it and in all honesty I didn't find the counsellor I had to be all that easy to talk to. So back in March I hit bottom and decided it was time to ask for help, my doctor prescribed me Citalopram and after a couple of months I started to see some small improvements, it isn't a miracle cure that made all my problems disappear but it gave me back that motivation to do the things which make me happy, my panic attacks were much less frequent and I saw a glimmer of hope. I even went down to London for my first ever blog event which would have been completely unthinkable a year ago.
Unfortunately it completely mucked up my menstrual cycle and I was having 17 day long period every month so last week I returned to the doctors and have now been prescribed Sertraline, I've only been on it a few days and it's made me pretty nauseous but I feel pretty positive that things are going to get much better. 

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